Honor Your Father

Read the Chicago Tribune article from May 12th that expresses a heartfelt Father’s Day wish.

I watched male loved ones deny their hearing loss. Left untreated, it devastated their lives.

Purging closets bursting with hideous ties reminded me of how difficult it is to “gift” a father with something of value on Father’s Day.

I had a very close relationship with my father and both grandfathers, who supported and protected me always. Fatherly and grandfatherly support is a profound gift for any daughter or granddaughter. I am eternally grateful for these mentors and wish their loving influence had persisted longer.

All my fathers had excellent longevity. But what could have helped them to live even longer, more engaged and fuller lives? Here is what I wish I had given them: Release from the need to appear to be consistently strong, self-sufficient and invincible. The ability to acknowledge and adapt to advancing age and associated infirmities and the courage to admit the inability to solve every problem alone. I wish I could have gifted them the willingness to seek and use help when indicated. To release them from a belief that seeking help means you are “less of a.,” whatever it is, that you feel you must always and consistently be, as a father and as a man.

The gift I would bestow on all fathers is the courage to address the curse that took the intellect of my father, one grandfather and my father-in-law. age-related hearing loss, also known as ARHL. Not being able to hear or properly process information made these men first defensive, then blameful, isolated and in denial. Eventually it rendered them less companionable and less interesting to people around them, ignored and, ultimately, avoided by those who might have helped them prevent the dementia that resulted from ARHL.

Read the complete article here >>