Patient Stories

The $75k Raise

A new patient came in to try hearing aids, and he was asked what led to the decision to finally seek better hearing. He said: “every year I hold a big event to thank my employees, and I would always just smile and nod during the party because I could never hear over the noise.  I came in the next Monday to an authorization for a $75k raise after I apparently agreed to it during the party.  I’m assuming hearing aids cost less than $75k.”

The Staircase Replacement

A patient came back for his first follow up after getting new hearing aids, and he looked somewhat upset. The patient’s wife, on the other hand, was smiling from ear-to-ear.

The audiologist asked the patient’s wife how things were going and she said “great, I don’t have to repeat myself anymore.”

The audiologist then asked the patient how things were going and he replied, “not great. I found out my staircase creaks so now I have to replace it.”

Wife: “I’ve been telling you that for years.”

Battery Low

Photo of Hearing Health Center audiologist x doctorSome hearing aids have a verbal “battery low” warning to indicate when the batteries should be changed. A new patient (who happens to be a physician) was recently fit with this type of hearing aid, and he wasn’t quite used to it yet. One day, as he was seeing his own patient, he heard “battery low” in his ear, and he turned to his patient and asked, “Did you just say ‘battery low’?”

Confused, his patient replied, “no.” Several minutes later, the doctor again heard “battery low” in his ear and again asked his patient, “Are you hearing someone say battery low?”

Later that day when his hearing aids shut off, he realized that it was his low battery warning and not his patient.

-contributed by Dr. Ashley St. Peter

Make a Left

A patient came in for a hearing test, accompanied by her husband. She said that she knows it’s time to get help for her hearing because she keeps hearing the wrong thing. She had recently picked up her husband from the train station and they were on their way to the gym. She was driving and her husband said “let’s go ahead and make a left right here.”

She responded, “what did you just say?!”

Her husband repeated himself and she heard him correctly this time. She said, “Oh my goodness. I thought you said, ‘let’s make love right here!'”

-contributed by Dr. Ashley St. Peter

The Follower

A patient went home after being fit with new hearing aids. As she walked up to her front door, she could hear that she was being followed. She quickly went inside, but still heard the sound of someone following her.

Concerned, she asked her neighbor to come over and help her investigate. Her neighbor investigated the house, but couldn’t find anyone else inside. The patient, however, could still hear someone’s footsteps.

It was then that they discovered the problem: it was her own high heel shoes on the hardwood flooring!

-contributed by Dr. Robert Risley

 

Wednesdays are free

A patient kept hearing music in his hearing aids in his bedroom. He did not hear it anywhere else, only in the bedroom.

When he told us about the problem, we had him borrow a separate set of hearing aids: he still heard the music. His wife listened to the aids at the same spot: she did not hear any music.

Photo of Hearing Health Center audiologist x disneyWhen the patient got his own hearing aids back, he could still hear the music. I asked him what kind of music he had been hearing, and he said that the music was “It’s a Small World” from the Disney World ride. As I started to gain understanding of what could be going on, I explained a phenomenon known as “phantom music” (musical hallucinations), and asked the patient if he ever worked at Disney World.

After explaining phantom music to the patient, he stated: “I have Wednesdays free.”
I asked, “for what?”
The patient replied, “for a psychiatrist.”

-contributed by Dr. Robert Risley

One Night Stand

A patient went to a gentleman caller’s home and didn’t want him to know that she wears hearing aids. She decided to leave her hearing aids in her ears all night, so that he wouldn’t see them.

The patient stopped by the office the next day, because all of the moisture and humidity from wearing her hearing aids all night caused them to stop working. She purchased a Dry and Store that day, so she wouldn’t encounter the same problem again!

-contributed by Dr. Robert Risley